I Felt Different

When I got back from Rome, things at work weren’t the same. I felt a different vibe, a vibe that I didn’t like. I felt different. Okay, yes I was mourning and not myself, but that’s the best time to actually feel what is around you. When I’m most sensitive, when my guard is down, I feel it all.

Everyone who I told thought I was crazy, but in time I would find out what it was. I know I write about a lot of bad things that happen, like how much I feel that my life sucks big well you know what, but as one of my friends described it, I have a black cloud following me. So here I am thinking things just can’t worse than they already are, from losing my aunt and having to watch my mother suffer and always being sick visiting specialist to everyday being a bad day to going on the most emotionally draining trip and trying to come back to the ugliest vibe surrounding you.

It was a new moon. Friday, April 8th and that’s when it got worse. I had my hat on and grabbed my coat to go home. I was so excited. That day, as I was walking around in the office, I felt this overwhelming confident feeling. I was working on a presentation and I felt real good about it, I finally was able to work on something creative and it felt good. As I was walking around with papers in my hand I felt important. I was thinking about how I was going to go to the bank the next day and take more money out of my checking account and have it put into my savings every direct paycheck deposit. I wanted to start saving money and I was seriously going to think about asking my landlord if he had an available garage, because I’m tired of going crazy looking for parking late at night and having to move my car for alternate side parking. I wanted to buy a new computer so I can start to teach myself how to use photoshop and paintshop to start working on my new ideas.

I had asked my boss if I could leave at 5 that day, since I worked OT last night and came in earlier that day I thought she wouldn’t mind. I had an appointment and she was fine with it. My day was finally going right. I was thinking about buying my parents a new set of wedding bands with diamonds on it for their 42nd wedding anniversary. Since my mother was planning to go to Italy for her anniversary and changed her flight when he sister died. I kept thinking about the pain my mother was bearing and how this gift would make her feel just a bit better. Things is my dad’s left hand is missing fingers, from his saw accident many years ago. He wouldn’t be able to wear his ring, but then I thought he could wear it on his right hand. All my dreams were crashed at 5:00 that day.
I was FIRED!