THIS IS THE SONG THAT NEVER ENDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hello, I’m the girl who has a lot of time on her hands, so I thought to share my life with the blogging world. I thought to put my creative writing into something that would have readers from all over the world caught up on my writing and always wondering what will be next. Well “the a lot of time on my hands” comes from a long lost friend that has disappeared from my heart. As you already know from reading my blog that this isn’t to pass time. This is called being creative, using my mind and expressing my feelings and at times, it’s my escape from my crazy life, it’s my hobby and love for writing. For all you new readers thank you for entering my mind. I hope you enjoy your reading and come back again.

So this wonderful story reflects on that song “This Is The Song That Never Ends”

This is the song that never ends. It goes on and on my friends. Someone started singing it not knowing what it was, and they'll continue singing it forever just because,

(start at top again)

Ok so it’s Frick That Never Ends. So Hope already told him long ago to stop.

Stop calling me.Stop texting me.Stop harassing me.Stop all communication with me.Stop! Stop! JUST STOP!

It’s been a very long time since she has even spoken to him. She has come to ignore all his crazy texts as if they are still friends. He text her as if they just had a conversation about what he just text her. He text her what he’s doing that day. She doesn’t give a fuck and why hasn’t he given up?

As you know he text me all that great stuff about how shallow I am and how I am Cancer and well how he told me to blow him. That is where I cut him out of my life. He then e-mails me this pitiful email, trying to make it look like how he’s apologizing for cursing at me, but he will not apologize for the way he feels. Well that I don’t ask for, I don’t even want an apology for anything, once I cut you out, you’re out. No one and I mean NO ONE curses me out and tells me that I am not a true nor a good person. Make up lies and try to make me look like the bad person. I don’t need someone who is filled with anger to take that shit out on me. I don’t need people to tell my friends not to trust me because he isn’t happy with the truth I have told him and her and now the world. NO ONE CROSSES ME! I had a birthday that just passed. In my invitation I was in a ruffled underwear and only angel wings. Implying that I am an ANGEL. I also put at the head of the invitation what my definition of ANGEL is to me.

Angel – (my definition of Angel) A pure innocent soul that lives forever. A soul that lives in a person who is filled with goodness and with tremendous love and the reason for their life is to help others. Once they die, their soul forever lives on where they become a guardian spirit that continues its reason it was born.

In my life, I’ve always put myself last. I’m still all the way in the back of the line, and I never care that I’m so far. Though I don’t believe in a god and all that religious stuff, I do believe that there is a reason why everyone is here. My reason was and still is to be a shoulder to cry on, to be there for everyone and help them in any way they need and I can possibly give them. My mother always tells me that, I should really stop doing all that I do, because you don’t think about yourself and in the end you always get kicked in the ass. I strongly agree with my mother on getting kicked in the ass, but I must add that I get kicked real hard. I don’t do these things because I want something in return, I do them because I want too and it makes me feel good when I see someone else happy. I don’t do it to get rewarded, I don’t do it to make people like me, I don’t do it because it’s the right thing to do, I do it because it’s in my heart.

My point is, if there is anyone in my life who will try to destroy that or twist that reason, they do not deserve to be part of my life. I really wish I could have helped Frick, but the only person who can help him is himself. I tried shedding the truth on him, but he did not want to see or hear it, so to him that makes me untrustworthy to him. He has said many negative and despiteful things about me and all of it is not true, so instead of acting like him (a child) I chose to be who I really am and that is me. I am a true soul that is filled with goodness and with tremendous love, I am innocent within my heart and my mind follows. I will show you how my true friends, who are real people and see me for the real person I am and not the fictional shallow person Frick has sketched me to be. I sent out this very email to a few friends and I will blog every single reply that I get back to you. Not only to prove to you that I am not what Frick thinks I am, but only because for you to get to know me as the person behind all these words and where I come from. The only thing that you do not know is my real name. Though I’m anonymous I want you to know the person I am. You don’t need to see me to know me. You just need to get in my mind.

Now back to Frick. After sending me that wonderful email, he forward it to Hope. While all that is going on, he still tries calling her and well text her all the time. This is all after she said she wants nothing to do with him anymore and to stop. She’s told him many times. Hope is going insane. After forwarding my email he’s been emailing her. Hope blocked him. She couldn’t take it anymore, he just doesn’t understand the meaning of stop. Hope calls me today and tells me all about the new email. Once you are blocked, you get a message saying your message will not go through. You will know that you are blocked from the person you are sending your email to. So what does he do? He sends that email after that reply your are blocked message and emails Hope on her other email address. Isn’t it obvious that she doesn’t want to talk to you???? He doesn’t give up - “This Is The Song That Never Ends”. Hope wanted me to blog his email and of course I have to put in my two cents. My comments will be in italics. At the very end I will share with you my email I had mentioned above that I had sent to a few of my friends with their reply. But here come Frick first.

“hey Hope,a little birdie told me that we needed to talk.they also told me that the only way i could talk to you is if i appolgize to CiaFai....because you listen to what she says.thats is vry true.i do agree wit that .to an extent.maybe now you can understand why it hurt me so much when she told me and you the only reason i opened a recording studio was to control you.that was wrong you know that .u also know how much that upset me.so i can not appologize for the way i feel. (he keeps infatuating on that, I never said that to him) how ever i do appologize for maybe (he said maybe? That shows that he doesn’t really mean it) cursing her in a way that only belittles myself.believe it or not im not that much of a brut.so what do you say .how about taking a step back and looking at the whole picture andsaying .was i really that bad. (is he on some kind of fucking drug, does he not see he is making himself look crazy and obsessive?, he is obviously blind and stupid and thinks he’s going to trap her with his manipulative email.) did i not always look out 4 you .were my intentions always bad and never good.i know you know that isnt true. (does he honestly think because he did good things that the bad doesn’t count, Frick it’s the other way around) look i would like to have a normal conversation with you. (how can she, when he is not normal?) because i know we always have had our ups and downs.is it really hopeless..i m not asking for you back i just think we owe it to our selves to figure out whats going on with our lives.(he doesn’t need to know shit about her life it’s over between them, like he said from his other text and emails that he’s going on, going on my fucking flat ass) furthermore you need to stick up for me a little more.honestly (Why should she stick up for someone who is making her feel that he’s damaging her soul?) Hope your friends are not always what they appear to be. (that’s because we are true and real not like him which he believes he is, but he doesn’t know the true meaning of those words as you can see) and if i have a problem with your friend.well i hope that doesnt mean i have a problem with you.think Hope will ya.there are different levels of trust out there.i learned that the hard way in life.i never hurt you,(NEVER??? HE EMOTIONALLY KILLED HER) always wanted the best for you.lets stop pretending im the big bad wolf please.we were broken up.and its because you broke up with me.(Yeah so get over it and leave her alone) and i still came to you when you needed me.(that’s because she tried to be friends with him, but that obviously didn’t happen) i dont want to go in circles Hope.im not going to be alone forever 1111 says that.i learnt from alot of mistakes through out the years and i know you have as well . and the truth has always came out.in these times that might be somewhat difficult for me (difficult time - meaning don’t take shit out on other people and that includes Hope and me, but you did fucker) i do know one thing everythingf is going to b e alright.,(So leave Hope alone!) because we really are two really good honest people.def not shallow like most of the rest of this world.i have alot of shallow people around me in my life right now.(he doesn’t even know what shallow means) when i go to them for help instead of helping they take a piece of me.but thank god for the few that are true friends the ones that i know who will always have my back when it comes to serious situations . they remind me .thank god who i really am.(the Dr. Jekyl side maybe) you have known me for a long time Hope and take this advice the same way an old timer gave it to me.no one is never going to tell you to clean your face so that yo will look better then them.stop being shy call me. (SHY? HELLO THE GIRL BLOCKED YOU NEVER PICKED UP YOUR CALLS NEVER REPLIED TO YOUR CRAZY TEXTS. SHE TOLD YOU SHE WANTS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU! SHE IS NOT BEING SHY.) because you know as well as i know you r strong and beautiful.and i promise to clean my face as well as yours: ) only if you clean mine too.you can start by sticking up for me with your buddy who s got me on some web site.a can you say some ones got just a little too much time on her hands.lol.(I’VE ANSWERED TO THIS ABOVE) i have actually been very busy believe it or not .by the lenth of this e mail it wouldnt seem it .lol.but im hustler (ok jerky, the meaning of that is TO TRICK )and thats whats i do best.you know me no girl means a whole lotta work.then again with a girl means a whole lotta work lol.any way you would be proud of me.i know i have not asked at all about your music but just so you know i still support it the same way i always had.R.S.V.P. “ (what is this a freaking invitation???)

So this is the last that I will write about Frick, because I need to stop writing about someone who doesn’t even deserve to be spoken about with my own breath I rather breathe in fresh air than toxic idiotic Frick. Time to start writing about positive people and intelligent things in my life and removing the drama. R.I.P Frick DRAMA.

Here is a little bit about me, this is for all you readers who found this anonymous blog. Welcome and Thank you.

Hello Everyone, Ok, so I'm doing this thing only for my own wondering mind. I've always wanted to do this, but never really did it till now. There are all those emails that are sent out with questionnaires asking us about ourselves, but you see, I want to know how everyone sees me, why they are friends with me. Ok.. ok... for those who know me really well know that there is another and better reason why I want all of you to reply to this email describing me and why you are my friend. Those related well you had no choice being part of me and to be family. LOL, but yes you too must participate in this.

Just this week, someone who I have removed from my life had called me names and said in all that I am not a true or good person. So, though I don't give a flying fuck what that particular piece of shit said, I just needed a little recap why I have so many great friends like you. So go crazy and describe me as you see and feel me, and I don't mean touching me. Tss Tss. I know some of you wise cracks will probably say some funny shit, but please include honesty. Now I also know that you are probably thinking CRAP CiaFai what did this fucker do to you to totally take him out of your life? Let's just say I don't deserve to be put down, so I'm asking you tell help bring me back up where I belong and that's surrounded by true people like you. Love you all. CiaFai

The replies….

Where do I begin. I'm sorry that someone has decided to describe you in that way but from what I know you to be, you are very loving, loyal, and sacrificing. I have witnessed it when we worked together, and even though we had our "play" fights like everyday, I always knew you would be a good friend and that you would help me if I ever needed it and vice versa. That is just who you are and that's why we're friends. There's all kinds of people in this world, some like this person you disowned and others like you. I prefer you, besides, you can sing pretty well too.

we are friends cuz u r a great person both inside & out. you are so pure and funny and never judges me for the choices i have made in my life. you respect me and with you i know i can have a good time and forget of my sorrow & worries, i am glad that you are in my life and most of all thank you so much for singing to my tummy when i was pregnant, no one did that and it made me feel good. i know this email will not do you justice because you are more than some words. i love you and care about you and the stupid person who shut u out of their life will regret it and it is their lose. anywayz, i hope this gives you some comfort and we are friends and will always be friends.

love you & miss you

Because you always welcome new people in your life with open arms...because you accept people for who they are, you would drop everything you are doing to be there for a friend in need...even if that means sacrificing your personal time, because you have a ray of light around you, you bring strength to me (and I'm sure others as well), you are so damn frieken funny, your silly ways make me laugh, your non-caring attitude about not being proper in front of people is actually inspiring!, because you're loyal and never talk shit about anyone...because you give everyone the benefit of the doubt if they mess up, you always answer your phone!!!!...lol you're always there for family celebrations, your loving and lovable, you have a big heart and are sensitive, you make people feel comfortable...you welcome everyone in your home and are very hospitable (and will cook them pasta with freiken pepperoncini if they're hungry dammit)...because you're such a damn good cook that you make me eat things I hate lol! because you are a genuinely deep and beautiful person. What can I say....because you are.............you.

ok who is he and where can I find him? CiaFai what the hell is going on? I leave for a couple of years and you let people get to you. what the fuck.... But ok ok I will tell you why we are friends your loyal, Honest, straight forward, you've ALWAYS been there for me, I know you like forever I was 3 you were 4. your sincere, loving, sweet, funny, crazy(in a good way),weird (once again in a good way), eccentric , original & You've been the greatest person and friend & Sister I could ever have. I Love You Man! NOW tell me what jackass dis-respected you so I could jump on a plane with my son, and he could bite his ankles while mommy kicks his ASSSSSSSSSSS.

Let me at that son-of-a-bitch!!! Are you kidding??? Someone cursed you out??? We all get on each other's nerves at one time or another but I definitely believe the complete opposite of what that person said about you. If there is anyone who is realer and truer than you, I don't know them.....well maybe me!!! lol You are never afraid to speak your mind or do the things you wanna do, no matter what anyone thinks. I believe that you are a very good hearted person and you would do anything for anyone, who is worth it of course! Again, same as me!!! lol I use to care what people would say about me, but not anymore. I know who I am, and love who I am especially now that I am older and no one can say anything to make me feel bad about myself. It's not being conceited......it's being confident and knowing yourself and your heart, and I believe the same of you. I have had my spirit broken at one time or another and it is hard to get it back, but not anymore. I have it back! Your spirit is the most important thing not to ever lose. Don't ever listen to anything bad that is said and just know that we love ya lots and hope you feel the same!!!

who is this asshole???

People love you because of your spirit. You are a loving person who would give your last dollar to someone in need.

I know that we don't see each other much or get together as planned, but, I do know that you are good people.

Rid your life of the undeserving. People come and go into our lives for reasons. Take this lesson from your former friend and continue to thrive as an artist and person.

You know........ I might know a few people who could help get rid of that problem person. hehehehe Only kidding! I would actually do it myself with pleasure for you! Well, I had no say at all in knowing you. You came with the family package. Like they say, you can't pick your family but you can pick your friends ( or nose if you like). If you weren't family, I would definitely pick you as my friend. You are a wonderful caring, kind and compassionate person. You are always thinking of others and go out of your way to help family or friends. I love you and I'm proud to call you my cousin AND my friend! Hugs and kisses, Your favorite cousin............ hehehe

Hey Girl, Well I love talking with you because, you are a real person. you are true at heart you mean what you say when you say it .You have helped me in so many ways and I thank you for that . Who ever this person is, is a complete Moron and I think he's the one that is not a good person. Your personality is great your not fake like others out there you keep it real ! As much as you need us right now we also need you, especially me!! so fuck this person he is obviously not worth the time and day . Your just CiaFai! with out you I don't know Girl! well I know life wouldn't be the same. . <3

DON'T FEEL SO DOWN....I KNOW WE DON'T HANG OUT MUCH, BUT I THINK YOU ARE A GREAT PERSON. YOU ARE FUNNY AND I THINK YOU ARE SINCERE. (NOT MANY PEOPLE HAVE THAT QUALITY). YOU ARE EASY GOING AND WE GET ALONG....I DON'T HAVE MANY GIRL FRIENDS. I DON'T HAVE MUCH IN COMMON WITH A LOT OF THEM. SO BE HAPPY......AND SCREW EVERYONE THAT MAKES YOU MAD.

Ok, how about I write a little poem. I hope you like it. The Story of Us... I've had many friends in my lifetime, but none who I've come across like I did this one time. Her name was CiaLaFai, but we all called her CiaFai, we all met in high school, the gathering place. Fifteen years gone by, and not even a fight, You know you've found a best friend when you can talk all night. You've been there for me through thick and thin, through good times and bad, when my life was a crumbling within. People should be lucky to have you in their life, someday, believe me, you'll make a wonderful wife. Men will come and go, but friends are forever, I can't imagine my life without you, we're birds of a feather. I love to spend the hours on the phone at home, just talking about nothing and never feeling alone. I can't wait to grow old together and having so many stories to share, with our kids and grandkids and anyone else who cares. :-) Fifteen years is not that long, To some people it might be, but to me it's just the beginning of A FRIENDSHIP THAT WILL LAST AN ETERNITY!

CiaFai why do you need other people to tell you what a nice person you are. I don't think your that insecure about yourself are you that you need that. You know deep down inside what a nice, kind, generous person you are. You don't need other people's opinions. That's where you run into problems. Have faith in yourself and be happy. Your a great person! Don't let some asshole bring you down.

There you have it, just a few people who do know me telling you who I am. I am who I am. I am CiaFai!