Saturday, August 13th was a long day. I had a block party, baby shower and a night out in a club. A MALE GAY club. The only reason I went was because one of my guy friends had to give a CD to the DJ. It was like a sauna, all these gay men where shirtless, well not all of them. I have nothing against gay people nothing at all, I don’t look at them any different than I would anyone else. Gay women, well the same as long as they aren’t trying to pick me up. Monday I start my new job and here I am with a hectic weekend.

My friend told me before we got to the club, that I would not have imagined the men I was going to see at the gay club were gay. If I had seen these men outside a gay club I wouldn’t have guessed they were gay. Let me tell you, I wouldn’t put it pass anyone. I don’t look at people for what they prefer as a lover, male or female. If it was anyone else, I could completely understand what my friend was saying.

I stood at the bar with my friend and two other people who were with us. Another guy and his friend, who was a female. When I first met her outside in front of the club, I thought she was the type who partied. By the end of the night I still had the same thought. I wasn’t going to judge her for being high or maybe just extremely hyper. It really didn’t matter to me. All that mattered was if she was cool and not some stuck up bitch. She was very familiar with the place. So from that I knew she was going to be cool. NO stuck up bitch would be a frequent male gay club attendee unless she has a penis and well… you know what I’m getting at.

My friend orders a screw driver and I bothered him about it.

“Ha! You just ordered a SCREWdriver in a gay club. You just got SCREWWED in a gay club.”

My friend is far from gay and I had to keep telling him that certain things he was doing was showing off his biceps. He would straighten up and look around hoping no one was checking him out. It was some funny shit. When he finished his drink, him and the other dude told us they had to go talk to the DJ. The girl and me stayed back, but we didn’t stay there, we walked around. Before we all parted I was checking out the scene. I watched the gogo male dancers bare ass jiggling, swaying back and forth, and thrusting their hoohoos into some gay dudes face. They were loving it. They were standing on top of the bar so I had plenty of bar asses in seeking distance. I didn’t mind, it didn’t bother me. I was sort of happy to be there. I didn’t have to worry about an asshole trying to pick me up and to put a cherry on top, an ugly asshole!

Like my friend said, there were men people would have thought not to see there. Short Asian men in their 20’s, Biker looking men, ghetto fabulous black men with a big diamond in their ear holding hands through the crowd. I watched them all and was glad they were so free but not for me.
As we were all standing at the bar, I kept catching the bartender staring at me. I thought he was gay and was just looking to look no meaning behind it. Why would there be, he wouldn’t be looking because he likes what he sees. So I thought, but still don’t have a clue. He might be bi sexual. My profile was aligned with the bar. I feel someone touch my arm. It’s him, the bartender. He extends his arm out with a bottle of water in his hand. I took my right palm of my hand and touched my chest suggesting the question
“Is that for me?”

Indeed it was. I took it with confusion and didn’t know why in the world he gave me water when I didn’t even ask for it. So I ask my friend’s friend, the dude, why and what the heck did that mean. He said…

“It means that, it’s a gay club. Take it and shut up.”

Still don’t know why he gave it to me. I took it and ended up walking with it in the club with three sips taken from the rim. The girl and me went looking for who knows who. She wanted to see if someone she knew was there. Our attempt in finding them failed. We passed by couples getting down, while one was sitting down the other one was straddling him on top shirtless. Then we passed this little room and well I only took a glance and I minded my own business. When we were at the bar I saw some small slanky Spanish dude go right up to a guy who just approached the bar. Slanky put his hand on the guy’s lower back checking out his ass and then moved him so he can check out his front. He did the back and forth thing. I’m guessing that’s part of the checklist on picking up in a gay club. Checking out the merchandise.

The girl and I bopped to the beat as we walked and tried to feel the music. We finally make it back to the bar. My friend and the dude weren’t there. Some gay Asian tried, I guess, picking me up. He touched my upper arm and giving me the eye to come over. I totally declined and kept walking laughing it off. I was about 20 feet away when I felt someone touch my arm and I thought this guy wasn’t giving up. So I kept walking ignoring the touch. Then came the grabbing of my arm, I turned around and discovered the dude, my friend’s friend that we came with. We both laughed. I told him that I thought it was some guy who just tried talking to me and he said he knew because he saw the whole thing.

Now we all reunited, going to the back bar. The girl and I danced our way there. We had drink tickets, so I actually got a drink. I’m down to one drink a night out. I watched two hot guys at the end of the bar exchange numbers and then make out and then walk away holding hands. GRAND!

Dude got upset because he saw his ex fiancé (a woman) there. He walked away from us to disappearance land. That’s when we got our drinks. We drank them and then searched for Dude. We found him slouching over a banister spying the dance floor. The girl and I were probably there for 5 minutes as the gay guy against the wall decided to dirty dance with us. It was fun. After that fiasco, the girl and I went to the dance floor as I handed my friend my purse to hold. Now he sure did look gay now. HA HA.
We went to the middle of the grand dance floor. So many men, so many not for me. It was great. I got to dance and wasn’t going to be bothered by some horny fuck. We danced and sweated our fucking brains out. It was a damn sauna in there. I was drenched. I told the girl that my bra was showing and no one gives a shit. I told her if I took my shirt off no one would care. It was great. Some guy tried dancing with her, he had no rhythm. Tried doing that Spanish dancing thing. I saw her look for help. I grabbed her and started busting the right Spanish moves. We laughed and had an awesome time. Then we danced doing our own thing. I had some guys around me cheering me on. We laughed the entire time as I kept screaming how fucking hot it was. My 7 jeans were permanently part of my legs, if I took them off I swore my skin would come off with them. So here we are two sopping wet girls in a male gay club working our way through a dance floor full of shirtless sweaty men back up to our friends. We were going to leave. We stood there and started to dance. A guy walks by and calls me SEXY. With one eyebrow up, with my watcha talking about Willis expression he started dancing with me. All on top of me. No shirt, muscles popping out. The girl saved me. He came right up on me again, we laughed. She grabbed my hand and we RAN. With my head tilted back, I couldn’t stop laughing. It was one of the gogo male dancers. Our friends found us five minutes later and we went home. Got home after 5 am. Got something to eat with my friend on the way home. It was a great night.