I Thought About HIM Today

I thought about him today, the man my friends told me I was in love with before I even knew. Well, that I think I was that I might have been that I still am but not sure if that’s what it is and was. Not sure. I thought I was over what ever it was and am feeling. I told my mind and heart to. It’s not listening very well. The thought of him just comes out nowhere every once in a while. It’s always different. Sometimes I get sad and get mad that nothing ever happened. Then there are times when I can’t stop smiling and just wonder what if. Then it’s the High School feeling you use to get, where you can’t catch your breath and your heart starts skipping beats and tries to catch up on the ones it missed by beating so hard and fast. The tingling in your entire body that numbs everything around you and just lifts you up with the butterflies rising into your throat from your stomach. The, I’m in another world zone, and all of sudden have visions as if you were the third party watching yourself and him the way you were when you were in each others company. Reminiscing the deafness, when you stared in each others eyes and even when you kissed how everyone would just magically disappear around you. How you fit so perfectly in his arms as if he was made for you. How it just feels right.